Review: ‘Morbius’ is such a bad movie, it doesn’t even work as an April Fool’s joke

Kyle Sheaffer, Staff Writer & Podcast Host

“Morbius” is a terrible movie. I just want to get that out of the way so in no uncertain terms does anyone misunderstand this review and decide to check out this movie.

It is a joke of a movie that attempts to ride off the success of the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) and the recent success of “Spiderman: No Way Home.” Sony meant “Morbius” to be a joke as they released it on April 1, 2022, and what a disgusting joke it is.

“Morbius” is technically a Marvel movie, as it’s about a Marvel character named Michael Morbius, a disabled doctor who turns into a vampire , balancing his new lust for blood with his desire to help the innocent.

The movie and its trailer are made to make people believe that it is involved in the MCU by casting Micheal Keaton, who plays the Vulture in the MCU, and by putting graffiti of Spiderman in the background of a trailer with the word “murderer” written over it, which was missing from the actual movie.

This aside, the movie by itself is terrible, with Jared Leto as Morbius making it so much worse. He plays Morbius as a very melodramatic character. His terrible attempts at humor make it hard to actually pin down any character traits of Morbius. I found myself actually rooting for the main villain. I kept hoping he would finally put an end to Morbius, both the character and the movie.

It would be so much better if it was “funny bad,” as at least someone would get some enjoyment out of watching the movie crash and burn. “Morbius”’s biggest sin is that the movie is boring. Just competent enough to not be ridiculously bad, but not good enough to make it a worthwhile watch. 

The movie’s generic qualities are also found in its mediocre CGI. It’s high quality CGI for a major studio movie, but I wouldn’t describe it as particularly good either. Rather, there were several strange decisions with the effects that made me do a double take.

The strangest of these effects was how they added a bloodrush sound effect whenever Morbius slashed someone with his claws. This would be fine on its own if the movie about a vampire didn’t decide to rarely show blood outside of a blood bag and one to two exceptions.

“Morbius” is a forgettable piece of Marvel’s ever-expanding media catalog. This mess of a movie could spell doom for Sony’s future plans to bore Marvel fans into forking over $20. All in all, this move just sucks.