Opinion: Breakfast Battle: Waffles vs. Pancakes
March 22, 2023
Waffles are better
Breakfast is considered the most important meal of the day, though I think many high schoolers would disagree, including myself. In reality, breakfast is the meal that you eat when your parents tell you to and you make when you want to feel like a productive human being.
And so, to my fellow students who undoubtedly lack cooking skills, I propose to you the idea of waffles.
On the few days when I actually make and eat breakfast, I am a sucker for a good waffle. Waffles are easy to make and the machine does it for you. No need to flip off a poorly flipped pancake when you can have a perfectly cooked and fluffy waffle.
I mean, who needs to worry about a failed Honors Geometry test when your waffle maker does it for you (further proof that geometry is useless?)You could practically learn your times tables by counting the squares of your waffles, but that is besides the point.
Truly, waffles are superior to pancakes for the following reasons: they provide you with delicious places to put syrup, and are a more fulfilling meal (both mentally and physically).
While many may criticize the holes in waffles as “giving you too much syrup” I would argue that they give you the perfect amount. They practically give you a guideline. As high schoolers (and chronic procrastinators) none of us actually want to use our brains. Trust me, thinking is hard. Waffles tell you how much syrup to put and they store it for you nicely. You’ll never need to look for the hole with a waffle.
Furthermore, waffles give you a sense of fulfillment to a greater extent than pancakes. Not only will your stomach be pleased after you feed it a sweet, fluffy waffle but your mind will also experience immense joy. The wondrous shapes of waffles and the aesthetically pleasing look of them naturally creates fulfillment in the brain.
As people, we immediately look for a purpose in life, desiring accomplishment and achievement. In my opinion, making a waffle that generates the same reaction from people when they see Chris Evans and/or Harry Styles (drooling due to the scrumptiousness) is an accomplishment comparable to acing an Honors Biology test.
We have too long lived in an age of hardship. We have too long pressured ourselves to be better, to work harder, when sometimes all you need is a break. So relax. Take a break. Make (and of course, eat) a waffle.
Pancakes are better
Few things make me feel more capable as a human being than making a nice batch of pancakes. There’s something about mixing the pancake batter and experimenting with possible flavor combinations that really feeds my god complex (no pun intended).
When I inevitably disregard the advice of the online recipe I’m following because “I can probably figure it out from here,” I feel like I’m Gordon Ramsey, and I’ve come to save a struggling restaurant by showing them how to make the perfect pancake.
There’s truly nothing like it.
Realistically, I’m probably freshly woken up on a Sunday at noon, stressing about having to do all of that homework I’ve been putting off. I’ve probably been humbled by a recent Infinite Campus notification on my Honors Biology test from last Friday. But once I make myself a batch of pancakes, I feel a sense of accomplishment as I think to myself: “Damn — I’m kind of awesome.” But maybe this is just a me thing.
All jokes aside, I truly think making pancakes (and, of course, eating them too) is superior to making (and, of course, eating) waffles for two simple, yet crucial reasons: creative freedom, and the absence of structure.
There are so many things we can do to make pancakes. For those of you who haven’t already, I urge you to do a deep dive into the world of pancake art. Ranging from drawings of flowers to ironic depictions of other food to full drawn portraits, the sky’s the limit when it comes to pancake art. Whereas with waffles? Confined to the boring, geometric design generated by waffle makers. In a battle of creativity, it’s clear that pancakes reign victorious.
Our lives are defined by structure, schedules and timetables that dictate how we spend our day to day. Especially as students, our livelihoods are contaminated with the frivolous necessity of scheduling time with academics, extracurriculars and even our free time.
But in the land of pancakes, the concept of structure suddenly disappears in the form of fluffy, heavenly dough. Without those suppressive boxes which are characteristic of waffles, we have the freedom to run wild.
No longer are we boxed in (pun intended) and forced to abide by preset designs. Finally we can experience what true happiness feels like when we arbitrarily flood our plate with syrup – pouring a little here, pouring a lot here, missing some spots entirely. Is this what heaven feels like?
Dear readers, I leave you with this. In a world where our creative freedom is stifled and our daily lives are polluted with the arbitrary need for structure and order, will you still really be reaching for waffles on those Sundays?