Naperville Central High School's award-winning newspaper.

Central Times

Naperville Central High School's award-winning newspaper.

Central Times

Naperville Central High School's award-winning newspaper.

Central Times

Hannah Madonia: What’s in a name?


It’s a pretty inarguable fact that there is not a single writer in history more famous than William Shakespeare. Every school curriculum there is has successfully left no student a Shakespearian virgin. The fact that “Shakespearian” doesn’t have a little red squiggly line under it as I type this is homage to the guy’s fame.


I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve had to study Shakespeare’s works in high school. I could tell you all about the plots of his plays, how they’ve affected literature and spew off Shakespeare knock-offs like it’s my job. But the thing is, I don’t know squat about his personal life, and I doubt most high schoolers know anything about it either, except that his wife had the same name as that Princess Diaries girl, right? I think it’s safe to say that the reason we don’t know this is because it doesn’t make one bit of difference.


To be honest, I couldn’t care less what Shakespeare did in his free time, what his favorite color was or if he was a dog or a cat person. None of that carries any weight with me.


The fact of the matter is, his works shaped dramatic literature and theatre regardless of the conditions they were written under. I don’t think it matters WHO wrote them, as long as they were written.


I’ll give the conspirators who think he didn’t write his plays credit, it does seem a little excessive that the guy could write all of that in such a short amount of time, blah blah blah. But in reality, I think it’s just a lot of people looking for something to fight about.


There are hardly any events in history that somebody hasn’t tried to challenge with a conspiracy theory.


We didn’t really land on the moon. Paul McCartney died years ago. The government planned 9/11. The Kennedys killed Marilyn Monroe. Princess Diana was murdered. There’s no end to the madness of unsatisfied people pointing fingers.


There’s a natural human tendency to question things, which is a generally positive attribute. All those futuristic utopian books that have been shoved down our throats since the seventh grade have shown us that questioning authority is important. But it’s only necessary to question when there is actually something substantial to be questioned.


I think most conspiracy is based in anger more than fact. The Democrats preach that the Republicans did it all. The Republicans scream that it was the Democrats. The poor think that the rich are out to get them, and the rich think that the poor are dirty liars. There is no end to the different social groups and the way they go at it.


It doesn’t even have to be one social class against another, some people just thrive on telling everyone else that we’ve all been hoodwinked.


And it’s not just the classics either. Type virtually any celebrity’s names into Google, and I guarantee you one of the suggested searches will be “is ____ gay?” WHO CARES?! What’s more is that you’ll be able to find at least 10 websites telling you all about that one time at that one award show when Brad Pitt’s hand lingered just a second too long on that one guy’s thigh.


Crap like that doesn’t make a difference. And Shakespeare’s legitimacy as a writer doesn’t either.


Why someone even felt the need to question Shakespeare is beyond me. There is such a small amount of knowledge of his life that there are barely any facts to support such a theory one way or the other.


So, I really don’t give two hoots if it was Shakespeare who wrote “Hamlet”. Nicholas Sparks could have written it and I still couldn’t care less. The only thing that matters is that it was written, and that it changed the course of literary and theatrical culture. If William didn’t do it, someone had to.

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